Sewing and Perfectionism


I would not describe myself as a perfectionist. In my life, as in my sewing, a desire to get things done overtakes any attempts at perfection. Once I see the end of a project is in sight, I can get a little slapdash in the race for the finish. But that's fine - I think I know this aspect of myself well. Besides, perfectionism can be damaging - it's nice to be able to let something go and know that you are up to 99% happy with it, and that's enough for you.

But how do perfectionism and home sewing interact? I have never been 100% happy with a garment I have made - there are always things I would do differently, from fit to finish. But I think this is fine as it keeps me motivated and thinking of what I will make next. And I'm a human, not a machine, so why would everything look absolutely perfect?

The nature of making something by hand means that it will always show the mark of its creator, and I think that can be a really lovely thing about home-sewn clothes just as it is about vintage or couture items. I don't have a serger so I don't have the option to finish my seams with a neat criss-cross of thread. Instead I use a variety of different seam finishes, from simple pinking to flat felled seams, french seams or turned and stitched seams. Again, my finishes are never perfect, but I love looking at this aspect of homemade vintage clothing and seeing how other dressmakers before me finished their seams and added personal touches to their garments.

How do you think sewing and perfectionism interact? Are you a perfectionist and how does it affect your sewing?

K x

32 comments:

  1. The way I see it is that RTW clothes are handmade, too :) just not by me, and in far greater quantities, which means some of the procedures differ.
    Unless, of course, you go right to the top end of the spectrum, where we're back to mostly single items being hand-made by highly skilled individuals.
    So, basically I guess what I'm trying to say is that for me, the difference is not the hand vs. machine but the amount of time I can invest into learning techniques and applying them.
    That being said, all my hand-mades have little quirks, and those don't bother me at all :D I'd prefer them to be perfect, but like me, they're not. Which is fine ... we are human, after all.

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  2. I am a perfectionist but sewing puts my perfectionism at bay. No garment will ever be perfect - just like you said - it will always have the mark of its creator. So I try to be as perfect as possible but in the end, I let go just a little. 98% out of 100% ain't so bad, right?

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  3. I'm terrible.. If I rush and don't make things as I would love I feel so bad about it.. Sewing made me so much more perfectionist

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  4. Actually I regard my sewing as pretty sloppy compared to what I see out there! I am conscious that I am terribly critical of what I sew, and I regularly "ave a word" with myself about not striving for perfection, because, well, it'll just never happen! I'm just happy that for the most part, I've reached a point when I feel I can make whatever my minds eye can envisage. That's good enough right? Who cares that most of my seam allowances are finished with a zig zag,lol! (I don't have an overlocker either, grrrr!) I'd like to finish all my seams with bias or sew perfect French seams, but like you, I see that finish line and then put my foot on the gas.... and then, well...perfection just flies out the window!
    Px

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  5. I'm definitely known as a perfectionist...(see my lated plaid-matching frustration) but, like you, when I see the end of a project is in sight, I often become hasty trying to just COMPLETE it, and the perfectionism doesn't return until I look at the finished object and wonder why it isn't 100% perfect. :)

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  6. Yes, I am a perfectionist. And a control freak too. Not the best combination :) My handmades aren't perfect though, I try to make them but I guess if they would be perfect, it still wouldn't be good enough. This sounds terrible, I know. And that is why I am trying really hard not to be a perfectionist anymore! Now I'm aiming for 80%, because I've learnt that the only one who sees the difference between 80% and 100% is you. And that difference is the thing that takes the most effort. So for me, good enough is the new perfect. After all, if it's good enough for me, why wouldn't it be good enough for everyone else?

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    1. That's a good point that it's only you that sees the difference between the 80% and 100%, it can be hard to be objective about your handiwork.

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  7. I have the exact same issue with things I knit too. As my mum tells me if i didn't point out the odd stitch/sew-up problem she wouldn't even notice it.

    Ah well - we can live and learn, and hope to be less picky!

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  8. I reckon it depends on what kind of perfectionist you are. There seem to be roughly three types. The first is the one who expects everything they do to BE perfect and gets frustrated and feels bad when it is not. It is so frustrating to be like this as it can take the pleasure out of progress. Always comparing oneself to a perfect idyll is very disempowering. I do however think that unlike some pursuits, sewing can be good therapy. Especially as most of us seem to have a perfectinist tendency like this, yet we love to sew anyway!
    The next type is defeatist perfectionists. People who won't even try because they know their first attempts won't be perfect.
    Then there's the perfectionists who see perfection as somewhere to get, not somewhere to be. Who are on a journey of learning.
    And I reckon the only difference between the first and the last types is cutting ourselves some breathing space, letting go of the fear of failure, and enjoying the challenge of success. :)

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    1. I think you have summed this up perfectly! And I think that I would sit in the third category. At least while a project is going well. If its a disaster I might end up in category 2 and not finish it or just do the minimum to get it finished and be done with it. I have too much stress at work and in life to then make my sewing stressful as well.

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    2. How interesting, I think you're right about the different levels/categories MrsC

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    3. This is such an interesting way to break things down! :)

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  9. I have been battling with my perfectionist tendencies since I started sewing and I think I'm getting a bit closer to getting it right. Initially, nothing I made was good enough (in my mind) and I was ever so frustrated. Then I swung the opposite way; I felt I took too long to sew things compared to what I saw on other people's blogs so I figured I might as well not fuss over the details and just do things faster. Needless to say, I wasn't too happy with the results at that time.

    I've now come to embrace the process of sewing more, taking my time to achieve a better fit and being more careful over each step to achieve a nicer finish. I'm far from perfect, my non-overlocked seams, my slightly misaligned zips, etc but I'm happier with the results and each time I finish something and look at the imperfections, I want to do a better job next time.

    As a side note, I found it interesting that when I taught myself to knit a few years ago, I was quite fearless. Cables? can't be too hard, Knit a cardigan? I can give that a go, Lace knitting? Sure. I tried everything with little regard of what I 'should' be able to do at my level. And was very happy with the results. Interestingly, this didn't translate to sewing when I learnt a couple of years later. Perhaps because the cutting of fabric is much more final than the formation of knitted stitches, which ultimately can all be unraveled if I so choose? When I reflect on both of these learning processes and the results, I would say that I was a better knitter at the equivalent stage than I am sewer. The lesson: be fearless!

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    1. Fearless is a good way to be, it can be easy to get intimidated and think things are too hard for you.

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  10. Nope, I'm definitely not a perfectionist when it comes to my sewing as I just want things finished! It can be frustrating though sometimes as I'll start off nice and slowly, doing things properly, but as soon as my make starts looking finished, that's when I start taking short cuts! Silly really! Anyway, part of my autumn/winter sewing plan is to take things nice and slow, in the hope of making something I am finally 100% happy with!

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  11. I am not a perfectionist with my crafts. That doesn't mean that I don't sometimes spend a crazy amount of time backtracking to fix errors in knitting, but it means sometimes I won't fix an error, period.

    With sewing, I'm okay with the inside of my garments looking decent but not amazing. This doesn't mean I'm not tickled at the bound seams of my recently completed trousers when I see them, but it means I could care less at a fairly sloppy looking pinking job on a skirt I wear a lot and love.

    I know I will never be a perfectionist with sewing. I agree with what you said about not being a machine and nothing I do is perfect. I'm not striving to be the best sewist, using the most couture techniques. I am striving to be happy with what I create for my own wardrobe, learning along the way. :)

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  12. I am a perfectionist, but to a point. I have my own level that I know is as good as I can give. My inside seams are not always serged with perfectly matching cotton, but only I can see that. I strive to make the outside of the garment as best I can so no-one but me can notice the imperfections, and that is only when I am being hard on myself. If I go into the stores I can always find more issues than on my own garments and so I am happy with that.

    That said, if I know there is a mistake, sometimes I will spend a lot of time fixing it as I know it might bother me. This happens most often in knitting as opposed to sewing. I find the knitting errors compound and become a bigger problem if ignored for too long!

    I used to be very slap-dash and never spend time on fit and finish, now I like to take extra time to finish items properly so I am more happy and will actually wear the garment.

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  13. I'm in your camp, as I work on a project I have to keep myself in check so I don't just say "well that's good enough". I just don't have it in me to stress about every little detail. Sewing wouldn't be fun for me at that point.

    I also have to be careful about sewing when I'm too tired because that's when I make boneheaded mistakes. Know when to call it a day is a good thing to remember. Also knowing when to rip something out (be it sewing or knitting). Some mistakes you can live with but some will ruin your ever enjoying what you've made. Knowing which is which saves lots of heartache.

    Christmas is coming up, maybe you'll get a serger from Santa?

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    1. I think knowing when to stop is important like you say, its good to be able to keep yourself in check so you don't ruin something by rushing or laziness

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  14. I think the urge to make things perfectly is what stopped me from even trying to sew for a very long time. I followed sewing blogs for ages and began to realise that it wasn't just the perfectly made pieces that were inspirational. Now I'm thinking being creative is about the process, if it's wearable/usable then that's a bonus! It's a real conscious effort not to point out every flaw and I do try my best but I know the insides of my garments would rarely stand up to scrutiny. Interestingly if I make a mistake in crochet I still have to frog it, otherwise it bothers me hugely. Perhaps the fact that it's less easy to rectify some mistakes when you work with fabric is actually teaching me a valuable lesson. :)

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    1. There are definitely some things that only both you, and even other people who sew wouldn't pick up on. That said, it can be helpful to see blogs where they post things that didn't work out too, to give a more accurate representation of the process of making things.

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  15. I would love to be a perfectionist...to a certain degree. Only if it meant having the patience to finish my seams beautifully rather than quickly. I always have the best intentions to catch-stitch a hem. Or add frilly lace to it. But when I see the finish line I just want it to end as quickly and as neatly as possible. Sadly that means I stick to a couple of seam finishes and a basic hem. Sadness. But one day I will get the patience to finish strong. One day :)

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  16. I think I have perfectionist tendencies. I try to take my time when working on projects to get them just right. Invariably, they aren't good enough for my own ridiculous standards - by which I mean I'll notice one really tiny tiny problem and obsess about it. For instance, the top I'm wearing today - the shoulders are a bit off... no one in the world would notice, but I'm sitting here thinking about whether I can still fix it. I need to chill out, I think ;) x

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    1. Heh, sometimes the more you wear something the less you notice the little things that bothered you. But those things can be enough to ensure that a garment never gets work too.

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  17. Good post! I really struggle with being a perfectionist and hating everything that I make. There are always so many things wrong with my garments, and I can barely stand to look at stuff I made a while ago-- everything looks terrible to me!

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  18. This was well-timed! I really enjoyed reading it, and all the comments. I wouldn't say that I am a perfectionist, but reading a couple of the comments above (MrsC and astitchtoofew) made me realise that recently I have become fearful and scared to try, in case what I make turns out not to be perfect (well, actually I'm scared what I make will be a complete disaster, but that's a slightly different story!!). You've reminded me though that the most important thing is to have a go, and that you only improve through practice - and that way, in the end, you will reach 'perfection' - or close enough! It seems obvious now that I've written it down, but I think I'd lost sight of this. I'm going to pick up some of the WIPs I have left languishing and will try to finish them, and not worry too much about whether they're perfect or not! Thank you!

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    1. Glad to be of service! There have been some really interesting comments here.

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  19. I'm definitely a perfectionist - usually. If it's something I know I can do, I drive myself crazy until every little thing is perfect. But if it's something I know I can't do, or can't do very well, I don't even try. Is there a word for that?

    Anyway, I've found that the best way for me to marry my perfectionism with my not-so-perfect sewing is to look at clothes in a store. Before I started sewing, unless it was a glaring mistake, I would never notice, but now that I sew, I notice a lot of little mistakes. I remind myself that if it's good enough for a store to sell (and something I wouldn't have noticed if I hadn't made it), then it's good enough for me.

    The problem comes in when I make something for someone else. I'm constantly stressed about whether or not they'll think it's just as good as something in a store or not. The end result being that I rarely make things for people, or if I do, I make sure they're involved so it's not totally 100% on me.

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    1. Looking at the mistakes in store bought clothes is a great way to remind yourself that nothing is perfect

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  20. Oh yeah. Sewing feeds the perfectionist in me, and the other way around. I've often wondered whether by sewing I'm just feeding the monster! But there's definitely 'that'll do' times for me too, especially as I draw to the end of a project!

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Thanks for reading and commenting - I love to hear what you have to say